How Many Cows do you Require??

            After 3 years in Latin America with semi-blonde hair, I am used to the occasional marriage proposal. Mom’s have presented their sons, friends have mentioned a cousin, and shameless men with one to many beers have far too swiftly followed “hola” with popping the question. But today I finally received the local version of the otherwise far-to-typical offhanded proposals I’ve previously received. Sitting down with an enumerator at our 3^rd household interview of the day, she turned to me and said simply, “He wants to ask you how many cows!”

            Fortunately, I knew what this meant, and was prepared to sarcastically overbid his request. When I booked my safari alone, it never crossed my mind that the experience would realize itself as me alone with guides and camp supervisors alike. While this led to awkward bush walks between two rifled guards and limited talking, it also led to lots of learning during dinners at Marc’s Treehouse lodge with the fantastic staff. This is where I learned the local value of a cow.

            In Zulu tradition, men must pay for a wife. Once they have decided who they would like to marry, they must approach the woman’s family and ask for her hand, and they reply with the required “Lobola” or estimated value of their daughter and her future. And the best offer comes in the form of cows. Cows cost approximately 8,000 to 12,000 rands (800 to 1,200$). And considering that this tradition spreads well into urban areas, their procurement may be more expensive, and quite tedious. Nevertheless, cows are the preferred Lobola.

            I asked my favorite staff member how many cows were normal. She said it depended on the value of the woman. On her beauty, her intelligence, her job, and her education. The cows, she explained, represent an investment in the future the couple will have together. Though presented to her parents, their value is usually returned to the couple in the form of a house, or another financial down payment to support their livelihoods.  I also asked this staff member how many cows she expected, “I’m clever, educated, and I have a good job,” she said “whoever wants to marry me better come with a lot of cows!” I tend to agree.

Another of my favorite South African women, one who led us through her neighborhood on our first day chasing Wonderbags told us she got 18 cows for marriage. Clearly proud, she also announced that she was worth every one.

I have asked many women here how many cows they expect and find I am consistently impressed with their answers. Not one has said below twelve yet, and the simple way they say it makes me believe they are worth every heifer. And as I left the house today, I couldn’t help but respect this tradition. For all I can see it has bred generations of extremely proud and respectable woman. It encourages positive choices, and it provides an excellent opportunity for self-evaluations. 

On Monday one of the enumerators asked me how many cows I would cost, to which I responded that I was thinking of a number around 25. He said, “What, are you royalty?” The enumerator on his right said, “Yeah girl, get your Lobola!” Together we reminded the young fellow that every girl is a princess, and I walked away once again impressed by the strength and power of the young South African women I have met here so far.

From the road. A fine example of the extreme contrast of wealth in this country.

We went to the south african version of costco. People here love BRAAI, or BBQ, and they had a HUGE meat section with HUGE meat for that purpose.

Briefing the enumerators after a long day of surveys in Chesterville! The survey is almost complete and we will deploy officially next month!

My friends and I upgraded to a new apartment. Its in the same complex, but has three bedrooms and is about half the price. Also, the view now includes two piece of ocean. The livingroom looks like a bachelor pad with a curtain fit for a stage, but that's another picture. Here's the view from my bedroom!